The man whose giant freak arms exploded

Back in the day, when my aunt and uncle owned a gym and I was a hormone-powered teenager, I decided that I wanted to get buffed-up, super-ripped and beefcakely, and started weight-training pretty heavily.

Unfortunately, I was born to be a skinny streak of proverbial and thus, never really got anywhere.

But I'll take my scrawny look over the one which Gregg Valentino crafted for himself through years of steroid abuse. If you haven't seen or heard of Gregg before - and I'm guessing that most people on this side of the pond haven't - comic book doesn't even do his arms justice. His biceps sh*t on the Incredible Hulk.

Feast your eyes on this.

The problem was for super studly Gregg that years of jabbing steroid-laden needles directly into his massive guns left him with an infection. Although it actually made his pythons larger - blood and puss by the bucketload will do that - his deteriorating health forced upon him the need to release the bacteria.

So he did what any right-minded steroid-charged man mountain would do - he took a needle and burst his ridiculously-inflated arm, turning his bathroom into a horror-movie scene.

And that was only the start of his problems - track down the documentary "The Man Whose Arms Exploded" for the full, and quite remarkable, story.

Needless to say, he eventually realised the error of his ways and - after years of supporting steroid use - now speaks out against them. Incredible stuff.

Right, I'm off to bang out some bicep curls - the wedding is next Friday and the Angry Blonde has requested a ticket to the gun show on honeymoon.

I'll stay off the 'roids though....

Cheers!