My end of season awards: Goal of the season
With tears in my eyes and a heart heavier than Ivan Campo after a full english, I'm forced to acknowledge the end of the English football season. Of course, the end of the season usually brings awards - PFA, FA, UEFA all of that - but those amateur shindigs surely pale into insignificance when compared to the first annual Playing the Links football awards.
Where to start? Well, as I plan to stretch a few posts out of this - rather than inflict paragraph upon paragraph of rambling prose upon you, my friends - I thought we'd start with the juicy stuff in the form of goal of the season.
I wanted to have a nice and tidy top three, but I couldn't keep it to just a trio of strikes. I am an indecisive fool.
So, without further ado, let's get to the shortlist and first-ever winner of what I'm calling the Matt Le Tissier award 08/09. Le Tiss did, after all, know how to score a spectacular goal.
4) David Bentley's 40-yard screamer against Arsenal. It's been a nightmare trying to track down a decent clip of the effort, but you can watch it here as the third of ten great strikes from this season. Possibly more entertaining is this clip of two rival cocker-nees as they try to out-barrow boy each other while watching the game.
3) Ronaldo unleashes a net-seeking missile against Porto - bet this one sounded almost as impressive as it looked. That ball must have fizzed as it ripped through the air.
2) Michael Essien unwinds the left peg for a jaw-dropping volley against Barcelona - turns out he isn't just the spitting image of psychotic Chris Partlow from TV classic The Wire, he can also play a bit of footy. In the words of The Wire's corrupt councillor Clay Davis, sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet!
1) I know this isn't a goal scored in England, or by an English side. But screw it, Grafite's wonder strike is the only goal that can possibly take the Le Tissier award this season. The man himself would have been proud. And it ended up getting Jurgen Klinsmann fired, so that just adds mustard to the hot dog.
Obviously, there are many goals that I've overlooked/missed/failed to remember. This is where you come in - let me know by leaving a comment below. The less abusive the better - I've warned you about that mum - but any feedback gratefully received.
And what other awards should I be handing out?
Cheers!